I’ll seriously feel bad for you if you don’t.
-Written by Adam Guttzeit
Please, for the love of God, go and try this delicious, nutritious (probably not), and surprisingly not fictitious magical treat. I don’t care if you have a gluten allergy, put this pastry in your suckhole before it’s gone forever.
Everyone loves pretzels. Everyone loves croissants. Just imagine the fusion between two of the biggest powerhouses in the entire dough based world. It is crunchy, flaky, salty, buttery, and sends a tingle down your spine with every bite. The French and the Pennsylvania Dutch combined forces to provide us with something that should have already existed for YEARS. Well, maybe they’ve existed, but it’s news to me and at least DD has the fortitude to put them on the map nationally.
Dunkin is trying to push it as a breakfast sandwich loaded up with bacon, egg, and cheese. While it was fantastic in this form, I still recommend just ordering it plain, with some butter or cream cheese on the side. The bacon, egg, and cheese overshadow how fantastic the simplicity of the pretzel croissant is. I also need to make sure I try one with mustard, if anyone does, holler at me.
My only gripe about the Pretz-Croiss, as I have been affectionately calling it, is that it could use even more of those big chunks of salt on top. The salt is the best part of the pretzel. If you’re one of those people who rubs off all of the salt, I do not want you in or around my life.
People love to criticize Dunkins food at times, but when they hit a homerun, they smack that shit out of the park. And as with all or most of their specialty items, they will likely not be around for much longer. I am telling all of you, if you don’t try it before it leaves, you will regret it. They aren’t even paying me to say this, but I would put my life on the line for this baked good.
I am looking into getting some kind of contract drawn up with Dunkin over whether I can get them to either:
1. Continue to make pretzels croissants forever because they are litty-bang.
2. Continue supplying me with them through means of delivery, at a discounted rate.
3. Sell me the recipe for a fair price.
4. Give me the recipe and let me continue to satisfy my every desire with these delights.
TLDR: Try the pretzel croissant or you're a dweeb.