Uh oh! I'm having a bad day today. Let's talk about it.
-Written by Zaynab Hashemi
Uh oh! I’m having a bad day today. Actually, I am having a bad day almost every day, because working in a small office has made me incredibly irritable. I sometimes find it difficult to even imagine a full day going by where something doesn’t happen in the office that upsets me viscerally. Working all day with people from completely different walks of life exposes you to a lot things that you probably won’t like. Let’s go through what has upset me so far today.
Someone Left an Empty Milk Carton in the Fridge
I’m not a big coffee drinker, but occasionally I have a poor night’s sleep and need a little extra kick of caffeine to get me started. Can you imagine, in your crankiest state of being, opening the fridge to grab a milk carton and finding that it was empty? Bone dry, not even one drop left? Only a CRIMINAL would lack the decency to throw the carton out and let reception know that there’s no more milk. Oh man, I am upset.
The Woman Who Has Had a Cough for Three Months Still Had a Cough
The woman who sits at desk 84 (only 10 feet away from my desk 95) continued to suffer from what sounds like a life-threatening cough. I am going to call her primary care physician and ask that they take a look at her. I cannot believe a person can suffer from violent, full body coughing fits for over three months and not be bothered enough to bring themselves to a doctor. One time I went to the doctor because I had a persistent cough, and guess what? It was bronchitis, and I didn’t go to school for a week. Desk 84 has pneumonia and should work from home, far away from me, until she recovers.
Someone Keeps Clipping Their Nails at Their Desk and I Think It’s the Woman Who Doesn’t Stop Complaining About Her Baby
If you work at an office you’ve probably seen notices from HR reminding everyone of the basics of good hygiene. Whether it’s a sign hanging up in the kitchen, or a memo being sent around at the start of cold and flu season, there are plenty of reminders to wash your hands thoroughly, or to cover your mouth when you cough. I searched through every single document sent out by HR in the past year and could not find one instance where employees were asked not to clip their nails at their desks. This is probably because most of us have the decency to do that at home, maybe in a bathroom, over a trash bin, alone. Not all of us know this, though. Every week, without fail, a woman who’s face I’ve never seen but who’s voice I am all too familiar with, clips her nails while making personal calls to complain to someone about her baby. I hate so much about this situation. I feel badly for her baby, who has to grow up under supervision of someone who has no qualms with grooming herself in public. This child is a monster in the making.
Hordes of Men Gathered Too Close to My Desk to Discuss the Cricket Score and Giggle Amongst Themselves
This is very unnerving and I don’t think I need to elaborate- but I will. These men are very adult, very large, and very loud. They shout about a sport that I don’t understand in a language that I also don’t understand. Sometimes they bring snacks over and don’t offer them to me. I can’t wait until their team loses, or whatever needs to happen to get them the heck away from me.
Someone Ate Lunch at Their Desk and Chewed Very Loudly, and I Don’t Like That Noise
What’s that disease where chewing noises incite physical rage? I just looked it up, and while it isn’t a disease, it is a legitimate condition that I absolutely without a doubt suffer from called misophonia. I am not a doctor, but my brother is, so I suppose you should take my word for it when I say that it is real. For those unfamiliar, certain noises can act as a “trigger” that creates anxiety, anger, or emotional distress. My trigger is that gross wet chewing noise that gross idiots make when they eat with their mouths open, and it makes me very, very angry. If you are guilty of this, I truly believe you should go to jail.
What gets you upset at work? Do you think I’m being a little crankster who needs to get over it? Let me know your thoughts in the comments.