3 Reasons To Support The AHCA

Here Are Some Reasons Why Someone Would Support The AHCA

-Written by Paul Gogliormella

The pending AHCA bill has received a lot of criticism thus far. Rather than just accept the mass distaste for it, I decided to do some independent research, and I think I compiled some reasons why you would support the AHCA.

1.) You Think Pregnant Chicks Are Gross

Independent reported that the bill states there will be major premium hikes "a completed pregnancy, with no or minor complications, would result in a premium hike of $17,060 (£13,200) – a 425% increase."

If you're grossed out by pregnant chicks, which I imagine Paul Ryan and his team are, this would be the best way to assure you minimize seeing them.  Making sure it is so expensive to have a baby, that most people on Earth can't afford it.

Super bold move, let's see how it plays out.

2.) You Hate People With Pre-Existing Conditions

Ughhh, nothing worse than someone with a disease, am I right?  It's let get over it!  Here are list of some pre-existing conditions that will result in premium hikes:

You know that kid on your block Billy that needed a puff from his inhaler after running down the street?  Yea fuck that kid.  Hope he's got enough money in the bank to survive the summer, nerd!

I think a more appropriate name for the bill should be "Be Rich or Die."  Quicker, to the point, and would probably get House Republicans to agree to the terms sooner.

3.) You're A Rich Old Fuck That Doesn't Care About Anyone, And Possibly An Evil Comic Book Villain

Are you rich?  Are you an old miserable fuck?  Do you not give a shit about anyone except for yourself?  Are you potentially Lex Luthor?  Then you've found the right bill.

I seriously can't think of any other reason someone would want this bill to pass.  Are they so out of touch with reality that they think everyone in America can afford to pay $140k if they have cancer?  Do they want no one to afford to ever have a baby ever again? 

It has become quite apparent that Republicans don't want a better health care system, they just want to repeal ObamaCare for the sake of repealing ObamaCare, without caring about the millions of people who will be affected.

Any thoughts?  Do you have any other reasons why someone would support this bill?